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amadeupname) wrote2008-03-02 04:01 pm
amadeupname) wrote2008-03-02 04:01 pm
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Well, I did it.
I finally asked Nick out.
I tried last night, while he was leaving, but I chickened out. So after lunch, I tried to tell him, waffled for a bit, asked him to walk back to Davis with me, waffled some more, swore, told him I'd talk to him later (after he asked if I wanted help with something), then turned around, called after him, and finally blurted out "Would you want to go on a date sometime?"
He kind of looked at me for a couple seconds, and then said he didn't know, and that he didn't want me to end up getting mad at him and hating him. (Where he came up with this concept I'm not sure, but I told him it'd be pretty hard to get me to hate him forever unless he was a complete jackass on purpose - and by jackass I mean pissing me off to the extent that I was horribly angry, not just teasing me to get me flustered like he usually does - and never apologized for it. He'd pretty much have to start acting like Hawley to get me to even consider hating him.) He asked if he could have time to think about it; I told him of course, that was the point of asking him now. Then we said goodbye and I ran halfway back to Davis, and somehow managed to neither hyperventilate nor cry during the entire thing.
I'm trying not to worry about it, but it's a little difficult. This turned out better than I thought it would, but now I'm stuck wondering for who know how long. It's almost as bad as a 'no' - at least then I'd know right away where I stand, and I could work on finding something else to focus on. But there's nothing I can really do right now, except hope that he says yes. =/
I tried last night, while he was leaving, but I chickened out. So after lunch, I tried to tell him, waffled for a bit, asked him to walk back to Davis with me, waffled some more, swore, told him I'd talk to him later (after he asked if I wanted help with something), then turned around, called after him, and finally blurted out "Would you want to go on a date sometime?"
He kind of looked at me for a couple seconds, and then said he didn't know, and that he didn't want me to end up getting mad at him and hating him. (Where he came up with this concept I'm not sure, but I told him it'd be pretty hard to get me to hate him forever unless he was a complete jackass on purpose - and by jackass I mean pissing me off to the extent that I was horribly angry, not just teasing me to get me flustered like he usually does - and never apologized for it. He'd pretty much have to start acting like Hawley to get me to even consider hating him.) He asked if he could have time to think about it; I told him of course, that was the point of asking him now. Then we said goodbye and I ran halfway back to Davis, and somehow managed to neither hyperventilate nor cry during the entire thing.
I'm trying not to worry about it, but it's a little difficult. This turned out better than I thought it would, but now I'm stuck wondering for who know how long. It's almost as bad as a 'no' - at least then I'd know right away where I stand, and I could work on finding something else to focus on. But there's nothing I can really do right now, except hope that he says yes. =/
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