I don't have friends; I have heralds.

[amadeupname]

I guess it was stupid to post about what I did last weekend; however, I assumed that, having a filter set up so that only those I wanted to read woult be able to read, I was safe.

Thank you, Jennie/ladyamda, for proving me wrong.

I filtered it because I knew you were not supportive of the idea of premarital sex. I filtered it because I knew you'd have problems with it and would do something. But I counted you as my friend, and I honestly did not think that you would stoop so low.

You have no right to tell THE ENTIRE LUNCH TABLE about such things. Yes, it's in my Livejournal. That doesn't mean I want you to tell the whole fucking school. That means, actually, that I trust you with this information, and that I feel you are capable of handling it and not spreading it around. Thanks for effectively condemning me as a whore and lecturing me, bitch. Please, do forget that you do many more things than I do that disappoint your parents, and I neither lecture nor tell everybody. I treat you as a friend, and you have backstabbed me.

You've also proven yourself to be a hypocrite. You talk about sex, write about sex, and look at yaoi. Yet, when I go through with having sex, you jump down my throat. I fail to see how that behavior is consistent with past actions, and how you are to be considered my friend.

This is now going to be a friends only journal. Jennie, you have until Monday, September 13, to reply to me via LJ, and then I am removing you from my friendslist, and to contact me you will have to IM me or email me. Frankly, I don't want to hear from you unless you are to explain yourself, apologize, compromise, or any combination of the three.

Am I not allowed to enjoy myself? Please, tell me, I'd love to know. I found someone who's physically attracted to me, someone I actually like in more than a "Oh, he's sorta cute" way, and we acted upon that. Safely. We took every cautionary measure possible. It's none of your business what I do, anyway. Even if I had left the entry available to you, there was nothing forcing you to read it. You could have very well left it alone, ignored it, and let me be.

So again, thank you so very fucking much, you horrible bitch, for shattering my trust and treating me like dog shit.

Oh, and Chelsey, as yours was the account Jennie used to read the filtered entry, I suggest you change your password. Obviously, Jennie will go to any length to betray.

Comments

[greyepsilon.livejournal.com]

Yes--but not everyone will ever be happy about themselves in some regard, will they? And sometimes, when you do end up thinking that you're alright, are you egotistical or aiming too high on reading your own emotions? Rarely do people that think of themselves lowly to rebound simply because it makes perfect logic to say what you stated. That doesn't happen all the time, and neither is it extremely safe to go cold turkey on it without rationalizing it to oneself.